Wiping out in the school hallway: Always Awk.

The title says it all, but really this needs a backstory.
SO, there I was, hanging out in the band hallway, waiting for a friend so I could take my awesome fake, lens-less hipster glasses back, when she gave them to my other friend, Kyle. (Shoutout to you, Kyle.) Naturally, he takes them, puts them on, and runs down the hallway to make his escape. So i chased him and grabbed onto his backpack handle so he wouldn't get away and I wouldn't lose my glasses. All of this lasted about 3 seconds, but it feels like so much longer. Anyway, he cuts around our group of friends and turns the corner to try and get in front of them. I, the determined being that I am, hold on to his backpack, even though I'm taking the sharp turn after he has and he's headed straight and I'm still turning. Shoutout to Emu boots, for this was made possible by you. My feet went out to try and grip on the floor and keep me going to get my glasses back, when all of a sudden I know my feet have gone too far out. Next thing I know, there's the loudest thunking sound and I'm on the hard school floor. My knees had hit the ground and I had just kept myself from completely faceplanting, but I still knew I had just wiped out in front of so many people. Classic. Classy. Klutzy. MILAwk

ps. I did get my glasses back.

I Dislike Titles..

Hello blogging world, I'm not weird like Elise and make up weird greetings like the number seven special at taco bell. Well, Elise and I are besties who lead pretty much the most awkward lives in the universe. Well I really don't even know where to start with this.. hmm ok I got one. So one day after school, Elise and I are walking down the hall, and this guy walks in front of us; and I just so happen to be in love with this guy. So I whisper to Elise, " I love him", and I kind of have this thing where I talk a lot louder than I should, and I never realize I'm doing it. So of course, he turns around, and whipped my hear around to look at the very interesting  ceiling tile behind me and pretend that I have no idea who said it. After he walked out of the building I just about died of laughter.. MLIAWK!

WWI in a nutshell

The Chubbly form of WWI , brought to you by Chubs.

Bolsheviks!

First Chubs Drawing

When you're a girl and someone comments on what your shirt says and you know that they're looking at your boobs, too. By Chubs

One-manning a dinghy.

Looks like I'm by myself on this wee little ship for now. Lack of Callie makes me feel pretty selfish all over this webpage. Yes, I referred to this blog as a dinghy, because calling it a ship is so much of an overstatement. But actually, the likelihood that I'll post daily is about the same likelihood that I won't have seconds on Thanksgiving. (ie. Less that slim to none.)
I'd also like to welcome our art department, Chubs. Chubs is our artistically inclined friend who will be posting HILARIOUS drawings about everything that's anything. Welcome aboard, Chubs! Golly, I am just rife with nautical jokes today.

So just when I was eating dinner with the family, and as I was slowly starting to believe I wouldnt have anything awkward to post today, awkward struck me like a 16-wheeler. I got up to put my dishes in the dishwasher and AWWW I realized I got spaghetti sauce on my shirt. Where is the most awkward place for a girl to get sauce on their shirt? You guessed it; left boob. As my parents got their millage out of that funny moment, it got even better when my mom said the word breasticle. My awkward 13-year old brother hates the word breasticle almost as much as the word boob itself. So we all laughed at his cringing immediate departure from the table, while I was left to wipe the sauce off my shirt. BUT WAIT, the awkward truck backed up and hit me again, as my dad says to my brother, "Yeah, go tell your friends that your sister is lactating marinara sauce." WHO SAYS THAT. As funny as I thought it was, coming from my dad was just plain weird. But then, after a laugh, he adds: "Like a true Italian." Which would also be funny except for we are much more German than Italian, and our biggest Italian trait is the amount of food we consume. So, father, this last part is dedicated to you;
MLIAwk.

~Elise

Chalupa!

Chalupa, my friends! Yes, chalupa. I like to use this as my greeting, because it sounds so much like 'hola' or 'aloha' or some greeting like that and because it just works so well. Nothing too awkward here, mostly just a hello and here's me sort of thing. Now I'm a teenage blogger and I feel SO FAMOUS. And Callie's my BFF and we are so AWK. Since I really should be studying for all the tests and quizzes teachers like to give just before Thanksgiving break, I'll just tell my MLIAwk story and be gone.
Ps. MLIAwk = My Life Is Awkward
Pps. This is me. Being awkward.

So there I was, earlier today, taking a nice warm shower. Singing "Who Let the Dogs Out" by the Baha Men. Why? Because I was born in the 90's and it is really far too catchy. And as I turn to reach for my shampoo, what do I see other than a spider. Backstory: I'm terrified of spiders and this isn't the first time this has happened. So OF COURSE it is crawling it's way back up toward the vent in the ceiling and I'm to petrified to get out of the shower. And the monster had me pinned to the opposite side from the curtain, in a cliche horror-movie pinned-on-the-wall pose. As I tried not to freak out at what had just been inches from my face, I gathered myself. Bravery would be the only thing that pushed me from the wall, underneath the vent and the spider, and out of the shower. I wrapped the towel around myself, knowing that my family would be suspicious of my uber-short shower, for I had turned the water off. I stepped out into the hallway, in my towel, dripping wet. "Daddy! There's a spider in the bathrooooom!" Did I mention my grandparents were in town? Yep, everyone got a laugh out of my predicament. And so, my father heroically crushed and flushed the wretched creature into the toilet, and I was left to continue my shower in only minor fear. MLIAwk.

~Elise